Where's My Toothpaste?

This morning! WOKE UP NATURALLY AT 4:25 AM. Which is blessing, I guess. I like getting distracted in the morning when I'm trying to get ready for school and seminary. Well, not really. It just happens every morning so I've learned to love it. Kinda. Woke up this morning in my delirious state as usually, and couldn't find my toothpaste. I remember shuffling through my kitchen saying

"I need my toothpaste. Or I will die. I will die. In the need of toothpaste. Toothpaste. Wants me to die."

I think that's why my parents shut their door five minutes after my scene in the kitchen.

Just now, I couldn't find my soccer bag. I was panicking through the house looking for it when my cat stopped me and started hissing. I don't know if it was the fact I hadn't straightened my hair and so I looked like an intruder, or because he was just annoyed with me. I found the bad under my bed, (SO NOT where I last left it) and walked out of my room to find the same dumb cat staring me down. I thought I was going to have to get ready for a feline throw down before seminary. That'd teach him a lesson.

Not really. I'd be going to school and seminary looking like I had just hugged the inside of a cheese grater.

Mornings, as you can see, are just not my thing. At all. Mondays, well, every one's Mondays suck. And if yours don't you need to stop living off your Aztec calendar and get with the seven-day week program. So you can imagine, a Monday morning, being the worst out of all the other days.

Not really. I'm just about as delusional as this every single school day of the week.

I've been trying to get completely ready for school before I go to seminary. This means teeth brushed, hair done, make up on and out of my pajamas. At my church building, I promise, they bought the ugliest mirrors they could find. These mirrors, are the worst mirrors I've ever seen. You're feeling good that morning? Think you're having a good hair day? Did your make up perfect? NOT TO THIS MIRROR YOU DIDN'T. Once you look in a church mirror, you'll want to go home and crawl under your bed like the little demon troll you see in the mirror. I am trying to avoid these mirrors at all cost. ALL. Cost.

Well, the good news is, I can't find my mascara. Which is awesome. Because my eyelashes are so small you'd have to lay me under a microscope that can see bacteria, cause I feel like that's the only way you could identify my eyelashes. By the bacteria on them. Wait. Do eyelashes even have bact- nevermind. Just, nevermind.

Welcome to my morning. I'm going to go now. BECAUSE I STILL CAN'T FIND MY TOOTHPASTE.